Monday, April 27, 2009

Is love ever self-less ???

Often we come across people claiming to have done something for the sake of their love. Many claim to have undergone a change or having made a sacrifice etc. for the sake of their love ? I wonder about what they are trying to convey here. I mean what is the emotion behind your act ? A character of selflessness for the sake of the one you love ?? Or for that matter Love ? If either of the above mentioned two is your answer then tell me are you obliging them by being self-less ? If you are and you think you are I would be very suspicious of your "Love" feelings. No offence intended here to anyone.

That stems from me belief that one should always do anything they ever do for their own sake and because THEY WANT TO DO IT. Why ? It is only then that you will not regret having done what ever you did. While absence of regret does not ensure no sorrow or pain, it however does ensure that you have in you the grit to bear all pain and sorrow that come as a direct or indirect consequence of your action. Imagine if the action was undertaken for someone else's sake and you had to bear the brunt.. How would you feel ?

I do not believe love is self-less in fact i feel it is very selfish. We are so greedy of being with the person we love that we go to great extents for them, we make many sacrifices and changes for them so that we can be with them. This is the part of the sentence that people I cited before fail to express or maybe even realise. Do everything for the sake of your loved one because you want to be with them forever and know you did not do it for them but for being with them ie. to say for a desire of your own heart. That should remove any feelings you may have off expecting the other person to return every favour you might have made. That should take care of great expectations people have and the give and take canker that creeps into love and poisons it.

I have been very busy and am in kurnool away from home. Haven't been able to read blogs either. Apologies.


  1. I have never been of the opinion that to be in love should imply selflessness. In fact, any relationship for that matter is tainted pure - tainted, by the sliiiiiightest amount of selfishness. Be it good friends, anything! You would *NOT* wanna lose him/her for anything. It is rather natural to feel *uneasy* if the person you are close to suddenly starts talking to someone else... It may take a while for you to accept...

    And yes - make all the *sacrifices* if you wanna. But if you regret it, the motive is lost.

    Nice one, dude. Good to see an update... Trust all is well with you. Will call you in the coming days.

    Peace. Have a nice day.

  2. after a long time something on ur blog:)
    Exactly the same way I think. Like for the children also I dont like to say...hamne tumhaare liye itna kiya and all that, because we did it for ourselves and got the instant return as happiness.
    Even for gifts I like giving only that much where I dont expect anything in return.

  3. i blv tht when selflessness is in the frame, it is nt spoken of..
    no offences intended either.. but when u r boasting tht I did this, or I did that, how can u claim to be selfless?
    concurring with Kartz, sacrifices shudnt be regreted..

  4. @ kartz. ..
    houdini ?? he he .. have been into many things lately ..
    reg. the post .. yeah point taken

  5. @ renu
    thanks ..
    and yeah thts true as well and have heard tht many times frm my father as well

  6. @richa ..
    well boasting ka nai pata .. i meant the talks two have amongst themselves .. and tht is the point i made as well when i said i would doubt the feeling of such love.

  7. in any relationship I believe in being possessive, frank and selfish.. good one here. goes right to the heart..

  8. kahaan kho jaat hai be...
    tu sahi mein gum ho gaya hai.
    don't get too busy bro...

    take care

  9. Well i can much we miss blogging when we are away from home or so...

    Good to seee u back..
    kurnool that is not so cool place but i heard there are few places around to see... watch them if u can...

    As for this post is concerned, you made me feel shameful man....

    I think i had been doing the same from last few months..i am feeling sorry for it..
    i wont utter a word of it now in front of any one... :)

    Wish me luck man....that the thing i am falling for so many days is LOVE and not just infatuation..:)
    Wish that person feel the same for me..:P see i am again selfish here.. :)

    Good luck... and come back soon...

    My blog is missing u badly :)

    BTW this new template is new right? mera kaisa hai batana kabhi :)


  10. @ preeti ..
    thanks .. i am nt sure i believe in the possessive part though am protective ..

    ty fr dropping by ..

  11. @ mahesh ...

    :) lets pray things straighten out .. i guess we all pick smthing frm each other .. thts the beauty of being open to perceptions ..
    ty fr dropping by

  12. Whatever you wrote is absoluently true... People do things cz they wanna do it, or isnt it that they do it for their own well being? If they do something for their love then dosent it mean they are doing it so that both of them could be comfortable... These are the pros and cons of the thing called "love" according to me...!

    Nevertheless whenever you probe deep into any issue, these abstract thoughts do indeed start pouring into your head. I was myself thinking of writing such a thing, but you have already done it. Wonderful realization. Good going. Cheers. :)
    Keep 'em burning. :)

  13. @diya .. thanks fr dropping by .. glad we concur . :)

  14. Im not sure if it's love or lust that is selfish. I think it's the latter.


  15. you love someone , becoz u love how it feels to YOU when you love him r her.
    even a mother's love clamied 2 b selfless is not alwyz without a reason, she does love coz d child comes from her , a part of her...

    but i thnk its fine loving for a reason .
    n i don believe n sacrifices either.
    only ends up making u feel dat ..yes! i deserve d same 4m d oter.
    give what you can give happly without feelin d pinch , or else don give.
    sacrifices r a big no no 4 me
    coz ultimatly it ends up strainin d reltionship.

    i agree wit ur perspective. :)

    enchanted illusionz

  16. You come across as a person who pursues truth in every sphere of life..

    Keep it up..


  17. read my blogs also

    a new blog


Let your perceptions flow